I first realized everyone can’t come with you after I started to really blossom into life as it is now.
When I moved to Atlanta, I realized that my tunnel vision had grew so strong that anything outside of the mission I was trying to accomplish became null and void.
It wasn’t until my first fall out with my best friend that I realized maybe I couldn’t hold on to everything.
You see, When I first moved, I was focused. Hell, I still am. But back then, I checked in with family and friends but hearing from me regularly was a rare occurrence. It was like when I called, they automatically assumed something was wrong, because they never heard from me.
I had things I needed to accomplish but I was so deeply engulfed in myself that my relationships failed.
I felt my first blow when my best friend told me she didn’t want me to be her maid of honor in her wedding because “I wasn’t there”.
I was crushed, devastated and following that, I missed the selection of her dress. I felt like our friendship was in jeopardy. I felt hurt but it wasn’t until recently that I was able to process how hurt may have been too, no matter how much she tried to hide it and claim to understand.
I had been so into myself, that i missed birthdays, my God Daughter’s activities, and I had gotten so disconnected from everything that I just gave up.
I felt like we went through this before when she swore I would have new friends when I got to college, but I always came back because it’s always been Day 1’s over everything. Then, we went through it again when I left to go to Europe and once Again I held out hope because I knew my relationship with her was deeper than surface level.
When I decided to be more intentional in 2017, it included my relationships. Breaking up/ Being in limbo with this relationship that means so much to me has had me in a total mind fuck. It’s truly been like kicking and screaming not communication and growing together more.
So, I pose this question…
Have you ever fallen out with friends who you were close to who meant a lot/the world to you? How did you move on or how did you go back to repair the relationship?