Self Care

Woman to woman, as a woman my ass

A week before my 27th birthday, I went through a deceitful break-up. After a year and a half of dating a man, my relationship came crashing down.

After being approached on Instagram by a woman who claimed to have been carrying on a relationship with him for 7 months, I felt a slew of emotions.

While I couldn’t be upset with her, because she didn’t cheat on me, he did, I still found myself frustrated with her although, I didn’t express it.

I held myself together with poise, and class as I spoke with her on the phone and listened to her detail the details of her relationship with him.

As expected, I was disgusted and heartbroken but I wasn’t defeated. For some reason, I still wanted to contact him and for some strange reason, I expected him to tell me it was all a joke.

However, that wasn’t the case.

What was factual was that someone I trusted lived a double life, much like the men I’ve dealt with in the past.

What was factual was that someone I trusted put my health at risk because they were too cowardly, to be honest, and let go of something they didn’t see a vision for.

What was factual was that someone I loved disregarded my feelings and emotions to be for themselves.

What does one gain from sharing an experience like this?

The clarity and peace of mind that while it unfortunately happens to all of us, that if us girls bond together we can take back our emotions and embarrassment.

As I talked to his other girlfriend, I couldn’t help but question where I was conditioned to blame the other woman for the mistake my man made. I grew increasingly frustrated with myself, because I was truly hurt that she not only interjected herself into my life, but she crashed everything that I thought I knew to be true about my relationship.

So for the last few weeks I have been challenging myself to really seek within to find out what would cause me to not only trust someone else over the person that I was with so long, but to continue to want to deal with someone who would crash and burn my false realities.

When I figure it out, i’ll gladly share the answer. But now I don’t have it.

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